Thursday, October 26, 2006

My Old Job v My New Job

My Old JobMy New Job
Scraping ice off windscreen/waiting on freezing platform for delayed train.Rolling out of bed at 8:30. Switching central heating and kettle on.
Dressing down days.Dressing gown days.
Whizzing around in cabs to meetings with high-powered clients.Talking to cats on the way to the greengrocer’s.
Phoning for a courier to take important documents across town.Being a bit excited when the post comes.
Gossiping about the office affair.Watching squirrels and birds on the fence outside.
Power lunches.Rooting around in the fridge for last night’s leftovers.
Happily sorting out domestic problems on someone else’s time/phone bill.Wondering how I ever had time to do a job as well.
Conversations with colleagues about last night’s television.Conversations with myself about Murder, She Wrote.
Making executive decisions about implementing system-wide upgrades.Making executive decisions about what kind of biscuits to have.
Stealing armloads of stationery at every opportunity.Going through my neighbours’ junk mail in case there’s a charity letter with a free pen.
The office party: decorations, drinking, dancing, debauchery, disgrace.Ooh! Chocolate biscuits today!
Full salary paid every month, even if sick, on holiday, or just not really feeling like working.Er, did I mention I can wear my dressing gown all day?